I have never ever thought in my wildest dream that I will meet Lam Li Li again. Simply because when I left her in Cedar I left her rather hurriedly. I was then very young and my first school to work in. Very inexperienced and all I had was the love for my students.
Tonight, she shared about all that she went through. We drove all the way to Sengkang where we had our dinner. It was quiet and she told her story amidst morsels of food. I listened, holding my breath, taking all in.
Li Li was and still is a very talented artist. She won the first ever Miss Cedar Pageant the same year she was sick. It was only a temporary chemical imbalance in the brain that rectified once she was put on a week of medication. There were no good counsellors then but with the one she knew, she pulled her through and was completely healed from the depression. She survived O levels and did well enough to go to a Junior College. I gave her a bible when she was in Sec 2. I gave books away too. She knew about the Lord because I shared with her the gospel. But she never accepted the Lord. She was torn between Buddhism and Christianity. In the end she embraced her youthfulness and pride and went to enjoy the many temptations of the world. She got into the modelling world for a while and flew with Singapore Airlines and then left to study. When she was in the States, she had a room mate who also gave her a bible. The two bibles she had collected dust. Her heart hardened as she rationalized why she should have a God when life was utopia. Every weekend would be party right through the nights. There was no fear of God.
She only came to know the Lord and committed her life to Christ after her sister came to know God. Her sister was moved by the colleague's love for her. Her colleague would invite her to church and there the sister would challenge any thinking. Eventually the sister accepted the Lord and even got another church sister to come and talk to Li Li every week. Li Li now started to laugh at her sister who is a Christian. In the end, Li Li accepted the Lord when her sister reminded her how she had so many encounters with God.
She committed her life to God about 12 years ago. But she was still smoking while she attended church. She was good not to show even her bible study group that she was clean and proper. She would wash her hands so they won't smell the smoke on her fingers. She was able to hide well. She told me she didn't understand the word of God even though she is a Christian. She didn't know what it meant that we are the temple of God. Slowly she began to realize that she was defiling her body and therefore defiling God, her maker. She confessed her sin and then overnight, the smoking bug was just gone like that. She told me that there is nothing we cannot do and cannot give up when we decide to honour God. Her journey is a personal journey with God. She yields because she obeys and the Lord is always waiting for us to return to the fold. Whatever reasons we have to walk in the flesh, God knows. God can see our hearts. And He will wait for us. Such is our Heavenly Father.
There was so much she shared. I was just overwhelmed listening to what a changed life! She attends BSF, a study group and she also goes to a cell group. I found out that she has been coming to my block for cell group for the last 2 years or so. I realized that there could have been times we might have bummed into each other. And so we met!!
I was never a good teacher. I thank God that He looks after my students while I went searching for Him. One other student is Peck San. I gave Peck San a book on Isabel Kuhn. She read and she came to know the Lord. She still kept the book till this day. But I never follow up when I saw her in the church I used to go to. Reason being that I want her to come to know the Lord personally. I was rather uncomfortable later when I left, I left without a word. It was not intentional. When I went back to church to look for her, she left the church already. So then began a journey of searching for her. Peck San is always special to me because she was my monitress and she helped me with Li Li. They were very close friends. Peck San is always quiet and still is. But she is always so thoughtful and kind to me. I found Peck San on the plane and we were both flying to Phom Penh. I went row by row to search when I thought I heard her voice and saw her passing by me. And I found her on row 54 from row 30. And now we are connected. God bless her for her faithfulness and her desire to serve God. She is single and focus on learning more and more about Jesus.
Then there is Lillie. She was a year younger and a different batch of student. I always like this monitress too. Very capable and always cheerful. Sometimes there was sadness. I never spoke to her about the Lord. In fact I bummed into her once before we eventually connect again. But I pray for her every time when I remember her that the Lord will save her soul. When I transferred myself to teach in another school, I was totally immersed in my work. Then I left for studies. It was then another journey of searching for Lillie until we met about 2 years ago at the Eunos MRT station. She was exiting and I was going to get my car. Now we are connected.
Peck San and Lillie are now my prayer partners. Yup. This is the beauty of our relationship. We can pray together and we will rejoice in heaven together. If I go first, I will be there for them at the pearly gates.
Babita is my next student I have always wanted to connect with. She will be going back to Nepal and both Lillie and I are burdened to reach out to her. Please pray for us as we prepare Babita's heart to receive God. She is another person who really cares for me. She is super busy but even then, she will find time to visit with me. I had so much fun last week eating steam boat with her. She also counsels me because I am her study since she is working on an MA course for counselling. I hope too that her family will come to know God. Her daughter Yovina and I meet to study together. I teach her SS and EGEOG. But I better start again. The tuition is getting crazier. I am so busy that I don't even have time for my own dad. I know it is wrong but after November 1, I will be fine!
I learn from these experiences that there are students out there who are searching to reconnect with me. Why?
I learn that what is mine will eventually be mine. I never ever dare imagine that because I shared the gospel and try to teach the word, this person will ever be grateful. If what we have together is special, then nothing will move us apart. If what we have is mechanical, a motion, then we will never ever meet.
I talked about the girls tonight.
I also have a man waiting to reconnect with me. I love this young man very much too. But when I reconnect I will never know.
Then there is another young man though we are very close and yet distant, always stand by me and believe that our love for each other will never grow cold. I am still waiting for a chance from God to work in his life. I know the Lord will when I saw with my own eyes how God protected and brought my girls to Himself.
Then there is one young man, always wondering and wandering if I will ever love and care for him. I cannot answer the question for him. He has to look into his heart and remember. Because to tell him will never convince him. I hope with this young man, the Lord will stir him towards God Himself. And that he will believe that God's love is enough. May he anchor all his insecurities in the Rock of Ages. This young man needs to come clean before God and man and set his path straight. Only then God can fill him and bless him with the joy he so desires, the love he wants to drink in. No condemnation but truth about how anyone should order our lives.
The joy of the Lord comes in many ways. And this week, my heart overflows with God's love and goodness as I witnessed how He work in Jolyn's life, in Karen's life, in Li Li's life.
My heart is heavy too with the wanderings of my young men. But I know they will walk back into truly loving our Heavenly Father.
Am I important to you? What did Miss Cheong do? What did Miss Cheong teach? I hope I don't just teach Geography. I hope my life reflects a Christian who is a work in progress, waiting for God to polish me so that I might live an abundant life.
I use to think if I pour my heart out, I will get returns and responses. I also learn to let go and let God deal with situations and people I know He wants control of. So I surrender my Isaacs to Christ and wait for Him to act. Only when Jesus work and for their own good, then can these people RISE above their circumstances, nail their flesh and rejoice with me in heaven. But I will be here waiting for them to turn towards God. Our ways are not God's ways. Our timing not God's timing. While waiting I want to busy myself in the kingdom of God.
I think Heavenward. What is on earth? Nothing much to hold. But I look heavenward when I am discouraged. Because God will send help.
J is doing fine. Thank you for praying for her. Thank you for asking God's protection to be upon her. She too needs love and she cries out for help. She is only 16 and GOD heard her. Help came and she is now at peace with God and with a clear mind and clean heart, she is growing. We update each other as we take turns to visit her and all the reports are so positive. She has been sleeping well every night since she accepted the Lord. Indeed the joy of the Lord is her strength.
K, the mother has invited her two other children to church. They are coming this sunday. They were jaded when God didn't answer their cry for help when their father hit them. Because of a change in their mothers, they are going to go to church. Please pray that God will save these two hurting children too. We are also going to continue to pray for my ex student who may have an unclean spirit within him. We pray for God's deliverance.
When we pin our flesh down and allow the Spirit to flow, God can work within us towards His glory. I am so thankful to God for all that is happening around me. I want God to give me an abundant life!
Dear Heavenly Father
I love You. You are just awesome in my life in the past and right now. Thank you for sending difficult people. They only draw me closer to you. Thank you that when I don't understand, you do. Thank you for being my defence because one day, they will know what You have planned for them.
Father protect my students from falling deeper into sin as the world gets darker and Satan and his evil ones deceive many. Please have mercy and turn them in Your own time towards You. Lord I pray you will pray for each of my students as I put them in your care. You are everywhere, ever knowing and always compassionate. So please Lord, send help when I cannot be there. Wipe away their tears for me. And bring them into the fold.
Thank you for Li Li, Peck San and Lillie. They are such reminders of your goodness.
I complained that you gave me things that are not good. Wow, you showed me that you have given me much more than my heart could contain. Yes, indeed You are the God of so much more. Thank you for all the good, the bad and the ugly. Because they are all good to me and for me. May Your name be praised.
You cannot contradict yourself. Your word is indeed life and those who believe and come to drink from You, the Living waters will never, ever thirst. So Lord we thirst for Your Love and Your presence in our lives. May you open our spiritual eyes to see YOU are near. Remove Lord obstacles and anything that will hinder us from offering to You our praise. Truly You are worthy!
I pray for the three young men. God deal with them in Your way and teach them to follow You with all their hearts, mind and soul. Thank you for each of them. For the one who is not saved, save him. For the ones who are saved, teach them to walk with you daily. Father I may be absent in body but you are present all the time. Love them Lord and keep them close to the cross where You gave of yourself.
I have a very busy weekend Lord and You know my heart and where it is. So bless me as I go do my presentations today. I am also very tired. So give me the portion of your spirit.
Be with my students who are taking exams. Give them energy. Help them focus. May they be careful with whatever questions. Keep them calm. Bless them with good results.
I know You can choose to answer any portion of this prayer because You are God. And so Lord may your will be done in our lives and may we be obedient to Your leading.
In Jesus Name
Amen
