Yes, I have been offered a more permanent job. When the principal heard that I actually went to another school for an interview, she quickly summoned me to her room and then told me what an impressive CV I had. She knew what I had but she did also tell her staff that she wanted to observe me first. But I cannot wait that long. So I was asked to apply to teach there. I did want to apply but now I don't want to.
I really think this is a great school. The students are good with some exceptions. But my heart is not really there. I find myself very drawn towards my boys. I miss my HP boys very much.
Although I kept a very low profile in this school, I was instantly noticed. I only taught once in this class and they have been asking the subject head that they want me as their SS teacher. I told the subject head that they don't know what they are asking for because the subject head herself is a great teacher. I am not that great.
As I was about to walk out of the school this afternoon, another teacher stopped me. He told me that a parent sent an SMS asking that I tutor her son. He was the form teacher of this boy and wondered if I could help. I remembered the name. I came across his script in the standardisation exercise and he failed. I also told the teacher that the boy failed because he was not objective. I will not tutor the son unless the parents do not interfere with his learning. I promise to meet the son tomorrow. The boy's father was from an opposition party during the 2011 election and he taught the son so well that the son criticised the government in his exams. I want to tell the boy I will not vote for him if he is so emotional a leader. He cannot distinguish when to stand and when not to take up the cause.
This evening was also different. I was to go give tuition to my 3 musketeers. One actually phoned to ask if he could get another lesson. I was stunned by his enthusiasm. I cancelled because there was an urgent matter to attend to and I had to meet this friend.
We sat and chatted about his problems and then we went on to discuss about me. He told me to go back to where I first started because he told me I would do a better job. I told him to stop thinking about not having any worth and that he too is doing a great job.
I know this. I know God is working in the shadows. When I obey God, things will fall in place. In fact there are things already happening that is paving my way. And I need to only trust God to lead.
Ahead of me is not an easy path. But I know this is what God wants me to do. I will obey.
Is it enough what Jesus has done on the cross? Is His love for us enough for us to do just this...to obey Him? If we really love Jesus, can we give Him our all?
I learn this about all the boys I have taught, they are full of pride. Those who say they are Christians are unwilling to give God their best. They hang on to their own pleasures and only give God what they want to give. God wants ALL.
I testify to this fact that unless I obey and turned from my own ways, God cannot and will not work.
Have your ever wondered why God cannot work a deeper work in you? Don't wonder. Just look into your heart. Where is GOD? On your lips? Only in your hands? At your feet? In your head?
Someone told me their friends were surprised they were Christians. Well, we are the light of the world. If we are not shining for God, then we are shining for someone or something else.
I have shone brightly about myself. And thank God for removing that from me. It was blinding when I was shining. I could not see God. All I could see were all that I could do and had done. I thank God He showed me that I am powerless without Him.
Tonight my friend told me that my face glowed. A few months ago he was super worried about me. He was very happy to see me so different tonight. I thank God too for walking me out of the doom and gloom. Indeed He is my Rock and Salvation. I want my Jesus. He cause me to lift my head again to behold His wonderful face.
Dear Father in Heaven
Paul said that he is persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come should separate us from YOU(Romans 8:38). May you so keep me and keep all those Christian young people in this same love. That nothing will separate them from your Great Love for them. May you remind us constantly that You are enough and YOU will satisfy.
Father teach us to surrender our all. There will be many who will tempt us from following you. Lord send angels to protect and guard us, especially our heart. Keep our heart in tune with your heart beat. So we know you more and more each day such that making sacrifices is no longer difficult.
Holy Spirit, lead us to follow the ways of the Lord. Teach us to be still and listen to your prompting. Our hearts are covered by sin, laden with desires that may separate us from God. So hold our hearts intact.
Lord fill our minds with your word. Remind us daily of what you have done on the cross and how much you care about our lives. You know how many hairs on our head. You know what we are thinking and what we design in our heads. You just KNOW even when we don't utter a word. So Lord guard our minds and help us focus on YOU and YOU alone.
And Father, may there be more of you in my life and less of me in my life. Not what I want to do, but what You want to do through me. Thank you for using this unworthy vessel.
Amen
For Bonita: These two videos are from a praise group stationed in Texas, USA. They are ABCs. Their music is good. The first video talks about God being our Rock and Salvation, God my glory, my cornerstone. He lifts up my head. Life may have its sorrows but when the morning comes, there will be rejoicing. The second video is about the Almighty God who reigns. He is love, He owns everything! All glory be to the Almighty God.
