Finally, the conference is over. I am so glad because this means we leave for New York on Monday morning and then on the 13th, the boys are to fly back with my colleague while I have to catch a flight early morning at 6am to fly to Calgary. Other than the first day when I arrived that I actually was extremely exhausted, the rest of the week was much better. I slept more and didn't move very far from the hotel vicinity. I realized more and more that I am really not fit now to fight the cold weather but I am still better than the first day.
I share a room with Laura, my colleague and we had chats about work. I was just telling her this morning that many of us in school are just surviving not living. We complained about the same things, stress at work and the tremendous amount of changes that will overwhelm us again next year. But we know we will survive like any other storms that the school will have to sail through. But is surviving sufficient for any of us these days? Is it better to survive or better to live.
Bringing 12 students have been really challenging this year. They took a lot of things for granted. We have one boy who repeatedly challenged our authority. This actually happened to us. The mother of this student refused to get the boy on board an MAS flight we booked because she never put her employees on such a ill reputable plane so how could her son fly in one. Well, she paid a sum of money to fly herself and her son to New York and then to Boston to meet us. She was in Boston throughout the conference but she was nowhere to be seen. Then the father arrived a few days ago. When asked when the father would arrive, the boy told us, a few days...rather rudely. I was already tolerating the way the mother changed not just the bonding of the group but also some of our itinearary.
Last night, he came knocking on our door to ask if his parents could join us on the bus journey to New York. I said NO! straight away. First because it is a school trip. I would very much want my boys to enjoy themselves without any further interference. The mother has suggested we cut short our shopping trip to get into New York early before we set out and I didn't want her to manipulate the situation. We have planned and many of the boys want to shop for their parents and friends in Woodbury. This aside, I even have parents who want the two of us to put their sons to bed by 10pm. This was almost an impossible thing because the conference can end rather late depending on their committees.
At lunch time, his parents called again. I heard him telling them it is a NO. I hope it stays that way. He also challenged my colleague and took for granted that we have to wait up for him because he could not find his US15 ticket for a week. He even calculated that he had to make 8 trips to make the money worth the while. At lunch time, I deliberately ordered buffalo wings just for Laura and I. We ate 2 out of 6 wings. I kept the rest. After I finished my lobster meal, my coleslaw was untouched. I decided to throw it away. He asked me if he could have the coleslaw. I said NO. He mentioned that I am wasting food. I said, "It was my choice." He kept quiet. Later after I finished the meal and walked out of the restaurant, I saw a homeless guy. I gave him the wings. I hope the boy learn a lesson. He can afford a ticket to fly on SQ, not all of us can. He always wanted us to bring him to the places he wants to eat but not all of us can afford. He must always get his way. But we are a team. So I decided he has to learn what NO is. He is coming with us to Woodbury. The saddest part of the whole issue is that he is groomed to be a leader. What kind of a leader is he going to be when all he thinks about is himself? I am saddened by this fact that we have failed in our school system to groom leaders. We now have a group of them who never want to find out what others think. And the sick part of the whole thing is that we deceive ourselves by saying we are doing a good job.
I wonder is there a nice way to teach this boy about his selfishness. Probably my ex boys will tell me that he is still young. But so what about youth? I was young once. It cannot be youth. So is there a nice way of teaching leaders about how they should lead? The ball will come right back on my court. Teachers are role models and the leaders tomorrow need role models. If the role models are poor, their behaviour will also be poor.
So what we teach is important. How we lead is important. What we teachers do with our heart is of utmost importance. I told Laura today that all my students got the brains. Everyone knows that. And honestly without me, the boys will excel academically and score for the O levels. We are not important just for the academics, we are very important to be their guide in giving them a heart.
So this trip showed me where my school failed. I hope we can do something more to rectify the problem. May be this boy needs to do community service. He is the only child of the family. Precious heirloom. But what is the use if this person has no heart for others. Agree?
