30th October 2006
We just finalized the tickets to go Beijing this Thursday. We thank God for the provision. Please pray for journey mercies. By the time we reach Beijing it will be about 11pm. It will be cold and we need to know how to keep the children warm. When mum heard Theodora is coming, she was overjoyed. Her appetite has not been good but she is happy. Dad is really feeling tired and bored. He has alot of secrets he has to keep and this is getting to him. We have to go and relieve him of the stress. I am kind of worried about his heart condition.
Tonight there are many who chatted with me to find out how mum is doing. I am overwhelmed by people's concern and prayers for mum. I will tell her that.
Will update you again soon.
Monday, October 30, 2006
Thursday, October 26, 2006
26th October 2006
This morning, I phoned Richard upon receiving his sms. He told me good news first, then bad news. The good news is that they are able to burn off the tumors near the stents but are unable to totally eradicate it. There is a need for her to go for chemotherapy now.
Another good news is that there was a tumor on her right lobe and that has disappeared. The doctors thought she had chemotherapy. But I believe it is the XP180 that helped kill that.
Now the bad news is that they found another tumor in the stomach. They are not treating that because there will be too much radiation for mum. We have decided that she takes a break and then go for chemotherapy. Perhaps the stomach tumor will shrink and then we will go back for another round of radiation.
Please continue to pray for her as she fights on. Her spirits are good but she does not know about the tumor in the stomach. She ate well and we are all going to visit her next friday. Pray for my dad. He is alone now to handle all these without my brother. He is not taking the news very well. He promised to find a cure for her.
We all need your prayers. We need to know and come to terms with my mother's illness. I have moved from hope to grief to acceptance over these past 6 months. She lasted this long and what a tough cookie!
Talk to you again.
This morning, I phoned Richard upon receiving his sms. He told me good news first, then bad news. The good news is that they are able to burn off the tumors near the stents but are unable to totally eradicate it. There is a need for her to go for chemotherapy now.
Another good news is that there was a tumor on her right lobe and that has disappeared. The doctors thought she had chemotherapy. But I believe it is the XP180 that helped kill that.
Now the bad news is that they found another tumor in the stomach. They are not treating that because there will be too much radiation for mum. We have decided that she takes a break and then go for chemotherapy. Perhaps the stomach tumor will shrink and then we will go back for another round of radiation.
Please continue to pray for her as she fights on. Her spirits are good but she does not know about the tumor in the stomach. She ate well and we are all going to visit her next friday. Pray for my dad. He is alone now to handle all these without my brother. He is not taking the news very well. He promised to find a cure for her.
We all need your prayers. We need to know and come to terms with my mother's illness. I have moved from hope to grief to acceptance over these past 6 months. She lasted this long and what a tough cookie!
Talk to you again.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
24th October, 2006
Since my blog started, many of my ex students have either left messages or read my blog regularly and then went online on MSN to encourage me or sms me. I am very grateful for all these wonderful students. One of the many things I look forward to working at HCI are the boys. I am very blessed with so many to call my own students.
The doctor gave me three days MC because I not only pulled a muscle, but also a nerve. I don't limp as much but at certain angle the pain is excruciating. I called mum everyday, twice a day to check up on things. Richard is doing his best for both mum and dad. His friends boiled some soups for her today and she finished them all. Last night she went to meet Dr Xia with dad. The doctor told my mum that her illness is treatable. It was a relief. She did her PET scan yesterday and did positioning right away when the report was out. They are putting her case as top priority because they had to work fast. He is very confident my mother can survive the treatment. What amazes Dr Xia was the fact that she climbed up to the third storey to meet him without even feeling breathless. As long as mum does not have fever, her spirits are up. Today something happened and she told us it is the work of the devil to discourage her and cause her to lose faith in God. She said the devil either uses the fever or the children to cause her to lose sight of God.
I praise God that my mother's eyes are fixed on Jesus. And she now knows who she is up against and constantly reminds us who she is fighting with. Mind you, all these from the little bible study she has. Faith is truly about believing what God can do, not what I can do or you can do. Faith will heal her. So please continue to pray for her. Many times I tell God that I am willing to take her place and give her my remaining years. She deserves every bit of life and I know God will give her this much.
I have decided to fly to Beijing next Friday night. I want to bring mum and dad home. Richard will be flying home on Thursday and dad will have to work with dad alone for a week until I arrive. Please pray that dad will be able to handle everything. I hate to leave him there alone but I really have no time and I must finish the course that started.
My trainee teachers are also very supportive of me. They will also cheer me up. Some will send me songs to encourage me and tell me they are praying for my mum. I am very thankful to all of you.
I wish all of you a happy working day tomorrow. I will put my legs up and rest.
Since my blog started, many of my ex students have either left messages or read my blog regularly and then went online on MSN to encourage me or sms me. I am very grateful for all these wonderful students. One of the many things I look forward to working at HCI are the boys. I am very blessed with so many to call my own students.
The doctor gave me three days MC because I not only pulled a muscle, but also a nerve. I don't limp as much but at certain angle the pain is excruciating. I called mum everyday, twice a day to check up on things. Richard is doing his best for both mum and dad. His friends boiled some soups for her today and she finished them all. Last night she went to meet Dr Xia with dad. The doctor told my mum that her illness is treatable. It was a relief. She did her PET scan yesterday and did positioning right away when the report was out. They are putting her case as top priority because they had to work fast. He is very confident my mother can survive the treatment. What amazes Dr Xia was the fact that she climbed up to the third storey to meet him without even feeling breathless. As long as mum does not have fever, her spirits are up. Today something happened and she told us it is the work of the devil to discourage her and cause her to lose faith in God. She said the devil either uses the fever or the children to cause her to lose sight of God.
I praise God that my mother's eyes are fixed on Jesus. And she now knows who she is up against and constantly reminds us who she is fighting with. Mind you, all these from the little bible study she has. Faith is truly about believing what God can do, not what I can do or you can do. Faith will heal her. So please continue to pray for her. Many times I tell God that I am willing to take her place and give her my remaining years. She deserves every bit of life and I know God will give her this much.
I have decided to fly to Beijing next Friday night. I want to bring mum and dad home. Richard will be flying home on Thursday and dad will have to work with dad alone for a week until I arrive. Please pray that dad will be able to handle everything. I hate to leave him there alone but I really have no time and I must finish the course that started.
My trainee teachers are also very supportive of me. They will also cheer me up. Some will send me songs to encourage me and tell me they are praying for my mum. I am very thankful to all of you.
I wish all of you a happy working day tomorrow. I will put my legs up and rest.
Monday, October 23, 2006
21st October 2006
This morning I attended church. I met Joshua who have been hounding me about going to church. I think it was last year that he told me in my face that God wants me to go to church. I looked strangely at him because I never quite knew if he understood what it was to be a Christian. I did hop around some churches with him and in the end, due to other commitments, I stopped going. I have been trying to find a church I want to call home since my return from my study in Calgary, Canada.
I came from a very conservative church since I was eleven. It was my mother who sent us to church because she wanted us to learn English. She taught us Chinese at home with the little that she knew. I remember her forcing me to read the chinese news paper out loud because I failed the subject in P1. I never liked the Chinese language very much. But as I grew older, I became more and more curious about the country and the people. I wanted to learn more about why John Sung loved it so much. I wanted to know the work of watchman Nee. I read their works when I was in secondary school. Very chim stuff. I read them all in mandarin too...all thanks to mum. One of my trainees just messaged me about the website of my previous church i attended. Wow! I was so young then.
Today's service was very good. Because God answered some of my questions. One of the pressing question is which church to go to. I am looking for one that is similar to the one I attended in Calgary. I walked in and I could see the similarities straight away. I never expected that the church was working on a purpose driven life. I was also surprised that in their 40 days of purpose, the pastor dealt with fellowship with the saints. He was advising us to join a church, to be part of the body of Christ. I understood why I need to go back. I am going back next week. Joshua and Shaun will be coming with me. Please pray for me that I will continue to hear God's call. I really want to serve but I need to know where and why. I think i found the one. It took me 10 years. 10 years is a lot of time to waste.
I will share a bit more tomorrow about the church. But now i must sleep. I pulled a leg muscle on my way back from buying medication from JB. Now in pain and limping. But I will be okay. Not to worry, but just pray.
This morning I attended church. I met Joshua who have been hounding me about going to church. I think it was last year that he told me in my face that God wants me to go to church. I looked strangely at him because I never quite knew if he understood what it was to be a Christian. I did hop around some churches with him and in the end, due to other commitments, I stopped going. I have been trying to find a church I want to call home since my return from my study in Calgary, Canada.
I came from a very conservative church since I was eleven. It was my mother who sent us to church because she wanted us to learn English. She taught us Chinese at home with the little that she knew. I remember her forcing me to read the chinese news paper out loud because I failed the subject in P1. I never liked the Chinese language very much. But as I grew older, I became more and more curious about the country and the people. I wanted to learn more about why John Sung loved it so much. I wanted to know the work of watchman Nee. I read their works when I was in secondary school. Very chim stuff. I read them all in mandarin too...all thanks to mum. One of my trainees just messaged me about the website of my previous church i attended. Wow! I was so young then.
Today's service was very good. Because God answered some of my questions. One of the pressing question is which church to go to. I am looking for one that is similar to the one I attended in Calgary. I walked in and I could see the similarities straight away. I never expected that the church was working on a purpose driven life. I was also surprised that in their 40 days of purpose, the pastor dealt with fellowship with the saints. He was advising us to join a church, to be part of the body of Christ. I understood why I need to go back. I am going back next week. Joshua and Shaun will be coming with me. Please pray for me that I will continue to hear God's call. I really want to serve but I need to know where and why. I think i found the one. It took me 10 years. 10 years is a lot of time to waste.
I will share a bit more tomorrow about the church. But now i must sleep. I pulled a leg muscle on my way back from buying medication from JB. Now in pain and limping. But I will be okay. Not to worry, but just pray.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
21st October 2006
Dad arrived safely. When I called mum the next day after she heard about the two tumors, she sounded okay. It was a very eventful night because dad was having a cold and he head to fly the next morning. I didn't know how best to tell him and just then Uncle Lawrence phoned. He spoke to dad and sort of told him what was to be expected. All the grandchildren were in the house that evening for dinner and so we all thronged around the phone and called China. Mum cheered up when she heard the voices of the children. I am so thankful we have six noisy kids in the house for once.
Dad slept with a light dinner that night and he couged every hour on the hour. I slept at two trying to tidy up the house and checking and double checking things. Dad is very fussy so he likes things tip top. I also happened to look into the drawers in mum's bedroom and found some cassettes. I thought it would be a good idea to give her. So i took a cassette and loaded the recorder and heard mum's singing. I burst into tears on hearing her. But dad was sleeping soundly in the other room. Mum is tone deaf. She is this way because she is deaf in one ear. But she loves to sing and loves to hear me sing. I used to sing at home with her and we will learn songs together. Any way, i packed the a few cassettes and also burn a CD for my brother.
I was online working with the trainee teachers who were asking me about work. A few of them encouraged me online. One even sent me a song "God will make a way, when there seems to be no way. He moves in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me." It was so timely because that night, I had to be strong. I didn't want to because I am so so exhausted. But the song allowed me to give myself the permission to rest.
The following two days, mum's spirit bounced back. In fact the next day, Friday, mum told me she is not giving up. Today, she added that her fever can go up to 40 degrees. Now the fever is totally gone. Her urine is now clear and there is no more jaundice. But one thing is for sure, the flu bug is still in her. The doctors in china did a good job in holding it down. She will be going to the radiography department for positioning of the radiation. This time it may be 12 times. They wanted to eradicate the problem. We still have the bile duct problem to contend with. Mum's appetite returned this Saturday morning. She laughed so hard while we chatted about what was going on with dad over there.
I am now at Rebecca's house for dinner. Mum specifically instructed that I should stay there over night and not be alone. I told her, at my age, I can look after myself. She laughed. But I am only here for dinner and after that home to clean up.
Friday afternoon has been a great one. I was home early . My godson has volunteered to clean up my messy room. Joshua came with Shaun and together they rearranged my library. They have started a project I stopped since mum took ill suddenly. I am so touched that they would be willing to help me clean up my mess and they are coming back again. I am very glad I know these young men. I am also grateful to my editor who visited me and told me to return to church. She said i should do it because it is for my good. If I am not fed, i cannot feed my mother. So true. I am going to church tomorrow morning. Thereafter going to Malaysia to buy the medication i so badly need.
Life is really challenging these days. But with God, the journey is more bearable. I heard worst scenarios of cancer patients. There was an ex student of mine whose good friend just delivered a baby and found she has breast cancer. After operation, the doctors found the cancers are now in th lymph nodes.
I wrote mum a letter on Thursday night. I told her to be thankful for each new day. To be reminded constantly the Jesus paid it all and only He can heal. I asked her to cry out to the Lord. Shout unto the mountains and call out to him for help. The cry that only she can make from within her and raising her eyes to see help come.
This journey is one in which mum leads us in our faith and we in turn encourages her with ours.
Please continue to pray that her blood count will go up and that she has appetite. That her appetite will be maintained. As the world moves on and rolls over, as one life is born and another demise, may we all know ultimately God is in control.
Take care and have a great holiday
Dad arrived safely. When I called mum the next day after she heard about the two tumors, she sounded okay. It was a very eventful night because dad was having a cold and he head to fly the next morning. I didn't know how best to tell him and just then Uncle Lawrence phoned. He spoke to dad and sort of told him what was to be expected. All the grandchildren were in the house that evening for dinner and so we all thronged around the phone and called China. Mum cheered up when she heard the voices of the children. I am so thankful we have six noisy kids in the house for once.
Dad slept with a light dinner that night and he couged every hour on the hour. I slept at two trying to tidy up the house and checking and double checking things. Dad is very fussy so he likes things tip top. I also happened to look into the drawers in mum's bedroom and found some cassettes. I thought it would be a good idea to give her. So i took a cassette and loaded the recorder and heard mum's singing. I burst into tears on hearing her. But dad was sleeping soundly in the other room. Mum is tone deaf. She is this way because she is deaf in one ear. But she loves to sing and loves to hear me sing. I used to sing at home with her and we will learn songs together. Any way, i packed the a few cassettes and also burn a CD for my brother.
I was online working with the trainee teachers who were asking me about work. A few of them encouraged me online. One even sent me a song "God will make a way, when there seems to be no way. He moves in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me." It was so timely because that night, I had to be strong. I didn't want to because I am so so exhausted. But the song allowed me to give myself the permission to rest.
The following two days, mum's spirit bounced back. In fact the next day, Friday, mum told me she is not giving up. Today, she added that her fever can go up to 40 degrees. Now the fever is totally gone. Her urine is now clear and there is no more jaundice. But one thing is for sure, the flu bug is still in her. The doctors in china did a good job in holding it down. She will be going to the radiography department for positioning of the radiation. This time it may be 12 times. They wanted to eradicate the problem. We still have the bile duct problem to contend with. Mum's appetite returned this Saturday morning. She laughed so hard while we chatted about what was going on with dad over there.
I am now at Rebecca's house for dinner. Mum specifically instructed that I should stay there over night and not be alone. I told her, at my age, I can look after myself. She laughed. But I am only here for dinner and after that home to clean up.
Friday afternoon has been a great one. I was home early . My godson has volunteered to clean up my messy room. Joshua came with Shaun and together they rearranged my library. They have started a project I stopped since mum took ill suddenly. I am so touched that they would be willing to help me clean up my mess and they are coming back again. I am very glad I know these young men. I am also grateful to my editor who visited me and told me to return to church. She said i should do it because it is for my good. If I am not fed, i cannot feed my mother. So true. I am going to church tomorrow morning. Thereafter going to Malaysia to buy the medication i so badly need.
Life is really challenging these days. But with God, the journey is more bearable. I heard worst scenarios of cancer patients. There was an ex student of mine whose good friend just delivered a baby and found she has breast cancer. After operation, the doctors found the cancers are now in th lymph nodes.
I wrote mum a letter on Thursday night. I told her to be thankful for each new day. To be reminded constantly the Jesus paid it all and only He can heal. I asked her to cry out to the Lord. Shout unto the mountains and call out to him for help. The cry that only she can make from within her and raising her eyes to see help come.
This journey is one in which mum leads us in our faith and we in turn encourages her with ours.
Please continue to pray that her blood count will go up and that she has appetite. That her appetite will be maintained. As the world moves on and rolls over, as one life is born and another demise, may we all know ultimately God is in control.
Take care and have a great holiday
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