It has become rather convenient for my colleague to say that he forgot to let me know this and that because he forgot I was not at the department meetings. I was suddenly asked to do a lot of last minute work and because he thought we used to work well, he started piling. I have got to be in charged of the International Friendship Day when I was asked to help give ideas. Then now I own it. Doesn't this sound familiar? I have my way of dealing with such behaviour and I ignore.
Then two nights ago he pleaded with me to conduct a lesson so that MOE officials could visit my class and know what it was like to learn with the International students. I told him that I did not wish to be observed because then these officials would think that all of us teach like that everyday and that we are all excellent in what we do. Of course when officials come we give the best lesson to try and carry out the pedagogy. So I declined telling him I don't wish to lie. But he was good at persuading. He pleaded and I retaliated. He didn't want to ask the other teachers because they are not as experienced. I told him if he allowed these officials to see me, I will probably impressed them so much that they would want me to join their schools. He then started persuading me not to leave my present job. He carried on till the next day and I told him if he continued I would really use the F word. He stopped.
So I did prepare the lesson. It was well designed because I thought out how the lesson would benefit my China students who are struggling with English. I have both Chinese and English video clips on desertification. I partner the two students according to language ability in English and Mandarin so they could help each other. I picked China because my Chinese students tend to speak up and talk about home easily and gives them a sense of pride too. The lesson went well. In fact my class told me later I was such a good actor. I was really pro. But I am PRO in my line. I have to be because I have spent more than 20 years to refine this craft.
Why the sudden change as to how I teach? Well, it dawned on me recently that I have neglected a student in my class. At first, I trusted him to look after himself and when he didn't come to school, I really thought he was sick. Although at the back of the mind, I thought he was slacking in the boarding school. When the guardian came to see me and I heard he lied about his grades, I was not only shocked but very angry. The father was put on the phone and I told the dad that his results was bad. So I asked the father to come to Singapore so as to thrash things out.
Later I found out that the student has not seen his father for more than 8 years and he was sent to a different province to study on his own in a boarding school at the age of 9. So home was a really distant commodity for him. When I heard that, my heart sank. When I was in a school in the rural areas of Sichuan, some of the students there have not met their parents for more than 10 years. This boy is an urban folk and he too has not seen his dad for 9 years. He is busy making money so the son can have a good life. But sometimes it is not about money. It is the very presence, the physical presence of the father or the mother that will make a difference in the life of a child.
When the guardian came looking for the student the next day, I sat down with the boy and the guardian and we found out a lot of things. He is actually very talented in computer skills. He taught himself how to use a software to make 7 short movies while he was not in school. He wanted to find out what he really wanted and so he stayed in the boarding school to think and rethink his options. I told him his only option is to finish the IGCSE exams and then move to other special institutions of his interest. I am also slowly teaching him in Chinese and then in English during the recess break of 30 minutes. Because of him, I decided to try creating worksheets that are bilingual.
The moment my colleague heard I have Chinese links in my blog that I created for the students, he froze. He wanted me to do this and that. I told him to his face that nobody can tell me how to teach because it is my lesson. I have my own style and I really hope people allow me to use my style because it is just me. When I am being me at my best, I inspire learning. So I ask him to let me do just that.
When the visitors came in, I introduce my class, and gave them permission to mingle with my students as they work on the blog. I also told the visitors what the objectives were and how I would lead on from here.
The visitors spoke to many of my students trying to find out why they come to study and how was the learning. They are very good actors too. But I know that they had fun today in my class. Every geography class was fun for me too. Walking into my form class has some joys.
Although we top the level this term, we didn't win the best class because our classroom is not clean. Well, I told my students that the class is clean just that others are cleaner because they brought their own mop and pails to clean the floor.
When the visitors went for refreshments, I went over too. I asked where they are from and then went on to ask if they have vacancies in their school. I went for an interview last year with St Anthony's convent very near my house. I hope to visit the principal again. She is very dynamic and very stern and she likes me. She told me and my friend who is the vice principal there that I am so real. She was shocked to find that I came just as I am, all that raw. And she like the honesty. I hope I will not change even if I have all the power in the world. I want to be honest with what I do.
In this world where honesty doesn't pay, I want to remain true to what I believe. I believe that good teaching must incorporate some tough love and caring love. It cannot be one sided. Over the many years of my teaching, I watched how I have grown. From one who used the rod to one who prefers to build the student. It is a long way to go but fortunately for me, my journey will end soon.
My students have asked me to stay ONE more year. Every year is ONE more year. It has to end this year. Knowing it will end makes my feet lighter and I can start to skip to the car park where Altis is waiting. Tomorrow is PRECEPTS time again. And I may not make it because we are all going to visit mum's grave tomorrow too.
