The long weekend is just so good. It gave me time to catch up with some very close friends. I had a great time sharing about what was happening to me over the past one year. These are friends I have grown so close to that even though we don't meet often, we always have each other in our thoughts.
Good Friday I went to Mum's graveside with Rebecca's family. Dad was there too. We noticed that the 4 o'clock flowers were blooming. Rebecca took some more and we planted them where the grass patch was. There were quite a lot of people in the Christian cemetery but the children were patient. They waited for our turn quietly in the car. Each time we go to the graveside, we all had to pray before we leave. My dad will stand right in front of mum's photo so she could see him. He would usually go there when he drives past the cemetery or when he feels like it. I wanted very badly for Dad to know that mum is resting and she will probably be busy with the angelic choir. However he would hear nothing of it. I know he misses mum and no matter what I cooked or how clean I could keep the house, it will never be like having mum around. I wish she was around too but then I know she is in a better place, a place where there are no more pain for her. I have released her on the day she returned to the Lord but dad still clings on. Sometimes I feel as if I am very cold blooded. I do miss her very much. But days can become so busy I forgot all about mum. Then I feel guilty about not missing her. It can be a terrible cycle at the beginning.
I prayed the last time when we visited before I flew to Lanzhou for my holidays. This time Rebecca prayed. I liked what she prayed. And she made going to the graveside a memorable experience. She prayed that God will bless mum's with sweet rest and that we will continue to remember who she was. Then she went on to honour my mother as the best wife, best mother and grandmother to the family. Subtly Rebecca reminded me and dad of mum's wish to make sure the family stay united. So all in all I was moved by how my sister prayed. And it was a long prayer. The reason why we went to the grave yesterday was because Theodora reminded us that we have not been there for a long time. We go at least once a month for two years now. I have been there much less because of my work.
Mum's death reminds me of Christ's death on the cross. His death is not in vain. He died so that we will live again. He is a risen God and his return from the grave was witnessed by many people. He promises to return again for His children on earth. I want Him to come soon and very soon.
The world is fast becoming a place of ambiguity. The more ambiguous you are the better, it seems. It is becoming a place where there is no right and no wrong and what is right is determined by what you think is right. There is no more need for laws. Is there a need to be civil? Is there a need for what is RIGHT and what is WRONG. Everyone seems very confident of themselves and the choices they made. Where is God in all these? He is not there in most cases when the self takes over. What is funny and what is not is also blurred. The state we are in is so deceiving that we don't even know we are wrong. The blurring of lines between right and wrong is what the devil wants us to do. It reminded me of the old bible times where there were false prophets that claimed what they did was godly and god fearing. Later it was the Lord God that came and consumed them to reveal what they really are.
Will God come quickly to consume the dross in our lives? Will He come quickly. Just today I received an email about a Tsunami that will hit certain places on 22nd July. Will we be more ready? Will we hasten what we have to do or will we say it is just another hoax. Whatever it is, God is coming and I take comfort in knowing this because the toil on earth is really getting mundane.
